from Ann O'Reilly, Apr. 11

Kim, 


Word on the street is that laughter is the best medicine. I definitely think they’re on to something, so I am hereby sharing with you three of my favorite jokes. Enjoy—and please know all the O’Reillys are sending every positive vibe available your way. By all accounts, your progress has been amazing. Good for you!
Much love,
Ann

An Irishman is driving down the street in a sweat because he has an important meeting and can’t find a parking place. Looking up to heaven he says, "Lord, have mercy on me. If you find me a parking spot, I will go to Mass every Sunday for the rest of my life... and even give up me Irish whiskey!"

Miraculously, a parking place appears.

The Irishman looks up again and says, "Never mind, I found one."

A man hears a faint knock on his front door, opens it, and no one is there. He sits back down and hears the faint knock again. He opens the door, looks down, and sees a snail on his porch. "What the heck is this?" he says, and bends down, picks up the snail, examines it, and throws it across the street. 

Two years later, the man hears another faint knock on the front door. He opens it, sees nothing, and then looks down. The snail on the porch screeches, "Hey! What’d you do that for??!!”

ALLIGATOR SHOES


A young blonde was on vacation in the depths of Louisiana. She wanted a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking. After becoming very frustrated with the "no haggle" attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the blonde shouted, "Maybe I'll just go out and catch my own alligator so I can get a pair of shoes at a reasonable price!"

The shopkeeper said, "By all means, be my guest. Maybe you'll luck out and catch yourself a big one!"

Determined, the blonde turned and headed for the swamps, set on catching herself an alligator.

Later in the day, the shopkeeper was driving home, when he spotted the young woman standing waist deep in the water, shotgun in hand. Just then, he saw a huge 9-foot alligator swimming quickly toward her. She took aim, killed the creature, and with a great deal of effort hauled it on to the swamp bank. Lying nearby were several more of the dead creatures.

The shopkeeper watched in amazement. Just then, the blonde flipped the alligator on its back, and frustrated, shouts out, "Darnit, this one isn't wearing any shoes either!"